why am I sitting here in this beautiful country bitching about how I have to stay in tonight. Bitching about how I have no money. Bitching about how I live with a 13 year old that is constantly talking smack to me. I mean, I should give him a break right? This is what I get for being shitty to my parents when I was 13, right? hah, sometimes if I was on the outside, I would laugh at the things he says to me because he catches every verbal slip-up I make. I did get him yesterday with ¨Jesus was JEWISH, so there!¨ then I chuckled to myself, reveling in the worst he brings out in me.
ah I digress.
Its just that when I talk to my friends, both foreign and spanish, they force their opinions on me, like little worms that crawl in to my ears and settle in the crevices of my brain. The worms dine on my insecurities and embarrassments, growing fatter and fatter until I find them spewing out of my own mouth.
¨I could have a much better time on my own, teach english, travel, have people over, go out when I want, be INDEPENDENT, get treated well..¨ etc, you see?
I wasn´t doing great on my own back home. Im not doing terribly here, and I´ve definitely been treated worse in my life and not for €70 a week either! I want to finally feel content being in one place- -
but maybe I need to move around a bit to create the balance--
Im completely and utterly confused--
psssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Listen To This: Eyes On You!
7 years ago
3 comments:
Jess...we never realize how much we put our parents through until we are face to face with fate ourselves...you are doing well...keeping your sense of humor and getting paid at the same time...just know that we are enjoying your adventures...Robbie's mom...Cheri
You are ridiculous
i know. so are you.
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